Positive Discipline in early Years

Helping your child learn appropriate behaviors is one of the toughest jobs of parenting. You do this by setting firm limits and sticking to them. When you are caring and consistence, your child will learn to follow your rules.
                Your child make choice about how to behave. There will come break a rule or a limit you have set. What will you do?
                        First think about why your child misbehave. Is he hungry? Bored? You may respond differently depending on what caused the incident.
                         Stay calm and ask your child what happened. Listen to what he says, then answer him in short, easy-to-understand sentences. Restate the limit, tell your child why his behavior was wrong, then remind him what your expectation are.
This might be enough. Or you may need to follow through with consequences. There are two kinds natural and logical.

Natural consequences can be pleasant on unpleasant. You do not have to impose these – they are simply what happen after an action. Unpleasant consequence (for example, your child gets cold after throwing off his coat on a chilly day) show your child that the behavior he chose did not benefit him.  You may have to explain the connection between your child that the behavior he choice or behavior and outcome he doesn’t like. 
Be sure that the natural consequences are not harmful or dangerous to your child.
Logical consequences are outcomes of the child’s misbehavior and is undesirable to your child. For example, if your child does not want to take off his pajamas and put him back to bed until he agrees to get dressed. you need to make sure the consequences are enforced firmly and consistently.
Positive steps to good behavior
·        Show your love through words, facial expressions, hugs and kisses. Make sure your child know that you care about him, even if you do not approve of his misbehavior.
·        Be available for your child on a consistent basis.
·        Keep his routines predictable. Let him know about change ahed of time.
·        Be consistent in your expectations. Use a claim but firm voice to let him know that he has gone over the limit.
·        Offer your child as he plays and explores. Give him all your attention as you interact with him.
·        Encourage and reinforce your child’s efforts -especially when an activity is challenging for him.
·        Listen to your child attentively and answer his questions or concerns.
·        Repeat what your child has said about his feeling so he knows he is being heard.
·        Give him options for release of his emotions-running in the yard, punching a pillow, throwing a big ball with you.
·        Redirect your toddler to positive and safe activities to avoid possible behavior problems. 

Negative discipline
    Negative discipline – spanking, hitting, sarcasm, verbal shaming, or degrading remarks-threatens a child self-esteem and emotional health. Spanking focus your child’s attention on being hurt and being afraid of you. Your child may eventually decide that avoiding punishment is the goal. She may not learn correct behavior.
·       Spanking is a method of dealing with frustration and anger that you do not want to model. At a time when your child is learning about how to treat others, spanking gives the message that this is OK to hot people.
·       Destructive or degrading remark or comments should never be used. This type of discipline can force a child to stop caring what other people say and can lead to antisocial behavior later in life.
·       When accidents or misbehavior happens, involve your child in solving the problem, but do not to make him feel guilty or incompetent. For example, if he spills milk, he can be given a towel to help clean up, but not told that he is clumsy.